ENCORE! OPEN MIC

May 1, 2000

A Poem Just For Moms
danielle dellaro 
God invented the seasons, but he invented mothers for a very good reason.
She's the one who brought you into the world, and stays with you till the end of
the world.
She teaches you the ways of life, and how to deal with sorrow and strife.
She knows just when you need her most, and how to cook a good pot roast.
When you feel sad and alone, she'll wrap you in her arms where you belong.
Then as the years they pass us by, there comes a time to say goodbye.
Even though your mother is up above, you will always feel her special love.
~*~

From The Children
Joshua E. Slickerman
One day we were born.
In your arms, you kept us warm.
Childhood years.. they were fun.
Helping us along, you helped us become.
Teenagers, that we are.
Before you know it, we'll have a car.
Growing up.. you led us on.
Before you know it, we'll be gone.
These times, they seem so hard.
This is our life, we are the stars.
We say things, we may not mean.
Our words aren't what they seem.
We listened when we didn't know.
We paid more attention than we showed.
Someday you'll be gone, who'll we look to then?
Just for now, know you are our friends.
Our parents, we look to you.
To do that parent thing you do.
One wish.. for mom and dad too.
Just know that, we love you.

dedicated to: every parent that reads this.

~*~

mama
when you went
i
saw a dream
melt

veronica

~*~

Jealousy
Lynne Jones 
Why is it every time I see her with you
A javelin is shot through my heart?
And why is it that when you take her hand
A dark cloud of fury lingers within my mind
Tears of hurt fill my eyes and drop onto my cheeks
For your sins I suffer, these feelings will always repeat
Your fickle love has left its scar on me
I am filled with hatred, doubt, but still there is love
A love that cannot be wiped from my heart
However hard I try to bring this hatred to the front
It is melted like an iceberg in the hot sun
And once more my body aches and my heart does pine
When you touch her like you always touched me
I want to rip out my heart and throw it on the fire
I want to cry and scream, take notice of me
Can you see how I feel, how I desire
For your arms around me, for your hand in mine
All this love, my body, my passion you decline.

~*~

Learn and Live
Ashtyn Shine
Eye for an eye,
Die or buy.
Tooth for a tooth,
Live through your youth.
Learn before you die.

~*~

My prayer
By: John Ratliff
father,
help me create more laughter than tears.
help me dispense more joy than fears
Help me show them that I care 
and carry off some of their despair

keep me humble keep me right
So I always see your light 
And keep me poor by all respect
so your love I wont forget 

~*~

YOUR PRESCRIPTION
Amelia Conci 
You swallow me. 
As I slide down your narrow tube
I start to disintegrate

I am liquid now,
Lying in your stomach,
Coating your lining,

I am a thick white film.
I will slowly dissolve
And save you from pain.

As your hurt disappears,
So will I,

And so will your memory of me.

~*~

Alone
Eaglefree 
I am alone in a forest
or so I think
blackness behind me
a twig cracks
I turn to look
a female wolf is looking at me
her fangs gleam in the dim light
she lunges toward me
now there is no more me
and she
is alone 
in the forest
~*~

sometimes i just sit here
sit and wonder
will it rain forever
or will it flood and take me under
lost in the sea of depth
going under
further
gasp for one more breath
arise
sunlight glimmers in my eyes
a dull surprise
alive 
stronger
no longer going under
is see the mountain tops
i see the imaging clouds
i see the life around
waters going down
i stop and look 
and i feel my feet touch the ground

 joshua mitchell 

~*~

BROKEN LOVE
Anet
the love we felt
the passion between us,
the looks, the desires,
the excitement that we had,
the strength of our love,
all so perfect
never imagining anything less,
all shattered, broken in pieces.
all in one day, in one second
all gone, forgotten,
only pain and rage left
too strong to break
too deep to forget
never again speaking
never feeling
only memories left
only hurt felt

~*~

The World And His Wife
bazros
The Earth was a loner for all of its life,
The Moon was a beggar for trouble and strife,
Mars was a miser, Venus a dream,
But Venus was death to the Earths woeful scream.

The Stars were the audience glittering brightly,
And 'Sorrow Hotel' was fully booked nightly'
Where is my sweetheart cried a looser for life,
But nobody knew save the World and his wife.

~*~

Alone
Emma Ioffe
It's hard to be the first, the one and only.
I walk the streets of mockery and filth.
I never met another one like me.
I am in love. And I am very lonely.

My lovers battle their own ghosts.
Will Revolution exorcise these spirits?
When I am tired I forget my fears,
Let's try to stay awake another night.

The morning comes, they beg me not to die,
But I won't promise what I can't deliver'
To spare loved ones often means to lie,
The truth is hard, they do not want to hear.

When every breath is challenging the world,
Lips taster of blood and every breath is sacred.
The time to hesitate is almost gone.
Make choice tonight and pay the price forever.

~*~

The price of freedom
Richard Reslink 
The price of freedom is paid 
with the blood of our solder's blood
widows and children weep at there lose
but the price of freedom 
has already been paid
Honor those who fought for us.
~*~

Camel
love
that's right,
love
once
twice
no more
love
again
I cant
better
that way
i say
again
love singing 
saying
drawing
i cant help it
i have to
i 
i
Ryan Roy 

~*~

REQUIEM: YOU HATE ME
Will Levy
I saw you yesterday,
I'd practiced all the things I'd say.
But you walked past me and right to him.
I guess that means that I lose again.

Turn around! Don't walk away! 
Just say the things I've always wanted you to say.
Won't you please just stay...
And make my day.

I wish that I knew
How to explain these things to you.
It's hard to keep them inside.
And you're always on my mind.

Turn around! Don't walk away!
Just say the things I've always wanted you to say.
Won't you please just stay...
And make my day.
~*~

Loving you
Stephanie Hildebrand 
I have a secret,
it's pure and true.
I haven't told a soul,
but I will tell it to you.

My life is so empty,
so dark and so cold.
I want to give my hand again
for you to hold.

When I am alone,
I cry and weep.
I swallow my pride,
my heart sinks deep.

Whenever I see you,
my heart skips a beat.
When I was with you,
I was head over feet.

I've said enough.
I'll get it through.
The thing I want to say is
I'm in love with you.

~*~

How sadly beautiful it is,
when the wax has dried up,
and the scent of it is long diminished
and the wick is all but gone,
.. . .How the flame reaches out, high, high above its usual
dream-forming glow,
and becomes a small fire for an instant. . . .
then is gone.

For when the wax was plentiful
and the wick on which the life was sustained
was strong and still a long, long way down
(so far it seemed unimportant),
it kept its flame low, and was. . .content.

But when it sensed that the wick was gone,
it erupted into a fiery explosion, a plea for more,
and asked with its vain last flicker,

"Why. . .why couldn't I have burned just a little longer?" 

Russell Moore 
~*~

The Connection
(Savannah)

A wild hibiscus bloomed.
All alone in a dusky room
It struggled for light,
To end its hard plight,
The flower grew-
But no one knew-
Of the internal troubles;
Difficult struggles,
Of the fragile bloom.

What would you do?
If you knew
Of a person,
like the flower?
Crying and helpless, longing to cower.
Would you let your roots,
Help them grow?
Or would you cut them off,
And leave them to the snow?

A person,
like the flower,
Longs to grow.
Just for that,
Show.
Let them know,
That you care too.

~*~

Withering Memories
Matthew Gangi 
Here I stand with heavy-hung shoulders
Pondering memories of past faded by
Thinking of the good times we had
Reaching out to the shadows with all my might
Still, You're not near me

There I sit with head held low
Dreaming the dreams of a day far gone
Eyes caked with wet, salty tears
A soul filled with unforgiven sorrow
Still, You're not with me

At last I lie on the dew covered grass
Feeling the cool breeze of the new-born Spring
Mourning the loss of a once unbreakable bond
Waiting in dark for your forgiveness
Still, You're a part of me
~*~

Fallen Into My Soul (To Adam)
By: Holly Lassiter
I can hear the sound of your soul inside me as I take each breathe,
Every word spoken is felt deep within and can't be taken from me,
The moment I hear your voice I feel such love beyond the realm of this world,
The pain fades through us as tears roll down our cheeks,
And the question is how can this not be meant to be?
We struggle so hard with hopeless feelings,
And yet we remain together at the heart,
To think of life without you my love,
Is something I couldn't bare or ever part,
I feel life offers us a chance,
To find our dream of undying romance,
To let it drift away so easy,
Would be ignoring the voice of our souls that have already decided,
That when they met in the beginning,
They knew it,
Touched and became forever united.

~*~

Suicide!
Standing on a building with a gun to my head,
thinking in just 2 minutes I would be dead.
Thinking of everything that went wrong,
it all started when I smoked my first bong.
Finally Bang I fell to the ground,
in less than a minute there was blood all around.
It took at least 1 hour for the cops to find out,
but with out a doubt,
I have been dead,
with a bullet in my head.
It really wasn't worth it smoking up with my bud,
because now I am dead lying here in the mud.
I had to do what I had to do,
and apparently my friend did too.
So now he is lying in a coffin 6 feet deep,
while every one is fast asleep.
So I beg you don't screw up your life,
but if I had listened I would of still been alive.
Dear: Mom & Dad
I love you a lot,
it really wasn't worth it smoking all that pot.
I wish I had listened to you and my friend,
because if I did this wouldn't have to be the end.
I just had to say my life was hell,
ever since I met my best friend Mel.
He had told me if I took a toke I would be cool,
but now I know I was nothing but a fool.
I an laying here looking up at the sky,
and I hate to say this but I love you and Good-Bye.
Anita

~*~

Life Without You.
by Carlos Watson Jr
A tree with no leaves,
A pool with no water
A bulb with no light?....
Something's not right.

A house with no roof,
A shoe with no foot,
A heart with no love in which to put.

A car with no tire,
A tire with no tube,
Could be a world without life...
or life without you.
~*~
it's been a while
since I held you last
but your smell
still clings
to my hair
and I find myself wondering
if you still see gold in the violets
and fairies in the ivy
and if you still pretend
that the stars sing
for those in love
and for a while I wondered
why
your lips
lingered
that one last time
and the spot
wouldn't wash
clean
Jamie 

~*~

I smelled your cologne today.
I closed my eyes and saw your face.
I could almost feel you next to me
Memories of us clouded my mind.
The first time I smelled your skin,
the first time I tasted your mouth,
the last time you held me,
the last time you told me that you loved me.

I think I am lost, or maybe I just found myself.
I am so different now, I am so different now.
I smell your cologne, and I can't remember
why I liked it so much.
Stefanie Steffen 

~*~

HEAVEN FELT
deana peters
Silent screams, hopes and silent pan,
Dried up tears washed away by ran.

Headstones of marble glisten and shine,
Names written in gold, love in each line.

Sweet fragrant flowers spell out his name,
toys lay by his side, singed by the flame.

Rustling trees, birds singing the only sound,
Peaceful feelings rising from the ground.

Soiled hands from Parents that really care,
Talking to his picture, he really is there.

This painful place so full of peace,
Heartache and tears will never cease.

~*~

NUALA
Mark McGlynn
Another lonely day with so many around,
Another bad reflection in my eyes.
Listening to the pounds of aching sounds
torturously tearing my world apart.

A thousand times i've seen it there,
Unforgiving and clear in its brutal honesty.
A million mad men running through my mind
searching for what they will never find.

But in all those thoughts and all those dreams,
You have the most beautiful that i've ever seen.
~*~

A True Hero
Amanda S. Beaver 

There once was a man to which belonged no name
he was only to be seen on cold nights on which they rained
People stopped and stared
But he didn't care
he saw things differently
he was a man of great dignity
he was great, but they never knew
how true he was
to his country
how brave and strong
forever long he shall live
~*~

Christine*    (precious osculation)
 -Matthew Berrien Smith

Bright-eyed Athena, template of wisdom sprung full-armored of mind
from the king of gods Olympian frame,
constant friend to my odyssean soul far roaming,
You pull the invisible string, this longing, and I return,
a bowman live with Kama, arched across the sky vault, East to West,
the sky dome sweep, our heart chord strung horizon to horizon.

Wave sprung, your hips adorned by Aphrodite’s girdle,
come high tide and harbor home, this kiss, this shoreline rapture, raveling web ecstatic. Still. Moving.
Shimmering fiber of fire— This life! --fingers flying on lyre like loom. Penelope still. Penelope moving.

Holding in her loving arms embracing all the far flung daring deeds, 
delays and dementia drawn down on hubris’ husband,
Holding now his dreams, unbridled conundrum undone like her locks’ 
long tresses falling endless, tumbling verdant round return.

A green man may survive the winter sirens howling, bound in longing, 
lacing and unlacing snow serpent signs along the way.
Until at last the olive trunk come again: Wake in the arms of love, 
holding all the world, one beating heart!
*for my girl, Buddha!

~*~

The Light 

Dark and weary
long and dreary
lift and glide 
keep reaching for 
the light in the sky
Every step heavier 
than the last
the longer you go on
the more the power 
begins to thrive
on every mistake and every lie
Everyone wonders 
some even try
but to get up there
you have to die
So there's your will 
to survive!
(HG ) 
~*~

Looks From You
Gothic Rose 

I get so tired of dirty looks it's enough to make me fall.
I come to hang around with you, then I'm up against the wall.
The outer smiles give way, to a battle from with-in.
It hurts enough to kill, but still I smile and grin.
The looks I get are daggers, as they fly into my heart,
Although I never falter, I already fell apart.
Then when someone sees, the pain flash through my eyes,
They will turn there back on me.
I guess I am the stone that they are leaning on.
But I am wearing thin, and soon I will be gone...
~*~

Discovered a valley of representation. it sent a tingling sensation. And I have no distribution for love today. Wishing I could feel some other way. But it's just not there. Why do I always seem to care so much, constantly grabbing some sort of clutch for what isn't there. Nothing seems to make detail expression fair. It just doesn't seem to me enough, the emptiness of of your solemn stare.
-KP

~*~

Sometimes I am amazed.
It seems no matter how much I give,
The less I receive.
Sometimes I am amazed.
It seems no matter how many times my world is shattered,
It mends back together again,
only to take an even harder fall.
Maybe it's all just pretend.
Maybe love is not real.
Maybe no one has told me yet,
maybe I'm just waiting for the let down.
But I'll continue to believe, 
and maybe I'll continue to get hurt.
Maybe this time there is nothing left to give.
Maybe I'll give up.
Maybe this time the pieces aren't mendable,
maybe I ran out of glue for my soul
and I don't have the strength
to pick up the pieces.
Tess

~*~

I'M THE SMILING CLOWN WITH THE FACEFUL OF LIES 
**by Marlene Rasberry**

Smiling Clown (with the Face-full of Lies)
I am the smiling clown with the face-ful of lies
you think I'm happy its a nice disguise
I cheer the world up when they need a friend
when your unhappy its me that they send
on the outside I smile on the inside I cry
Everyday it's someone else's tear that I dry
I make the world smile by telling a joke or two
preserving unhappy peoples lives is exactly what I do
living in laughter while I'm dying in tears
secretly hiding my sorrow and pain I adhere
you may think I'm great even want to be like me
that's only because you see what i let you see
the happiness is the cover-up and the face is full of lies
I'm really unhappy in this wonderful disguise
pain is the tragedy and my misery is real
I somehow saves lives while experiencing what I feel
so when your unhappy give me a try, I can work miracles even though
~*~

the warbling 
of a meadow lark 
overhead 
those words of love you wrote 
in the sky with your fingers

Fred

~*~

The Mornin' After
I stepped over the broken bottles of yesterday's night and realized the frolicking that forced me to new heights in my undead celebration of frazzled ladies with topless cigarette boxes lining the linen closet the next morning and the mysterious pattern of lipstick emblazened on my white collar of a ten and dime store dress shirt and a strange stoic girl in the bedside next to me who's claiming her name's Magnolan but I know her better as Jezebellafontaine a local yokle and toothless hooker down at Monroes padded cell Jesuit College and Fish farm where the sturgeons gasp at the hinted colors of the sepia toned landscape drowsy with alcohol breath ironic smirks on the eye of the beholder who siteth at the right hand of the father's almighty whip that whips me out of bed cause the life I'm livin is dread and I don't think I can get it up anymore.
Wells Addington 

~*~

TORN
john kistner

worn, tattered, beat to death, the laughter fills the air
i look up from the dust to see that no one really cares
the pain still hurts, the wounds still bleed, alls lost in my despair 
could try to hide this pain inside now victimed i must care
forced into war with the one his only hope for love
but misery his gift received left broken in blood
of times they fought same as before, for him to bad again
to only hope his thoughts once pure , now filthy filled with sin
for war to end an end must come, for one side to have peace
i hope and pray that on that day i wont end up deceased
one tries to choose the path of light to walk among in day
but one must know their path of light a heavy price to pay

~*~

Today, walnuts were my guides and they were monsters
And we can share all of our goods 
...erased like disparate characters
ephemeral like things "homemade" 
I am overwhelmed by shoe size among other things
an ellipsis replaces ingenuity
a softer bath, with genteel women in touchable skin
loosely 
wretched...
 jacobazulay

~*~

What's Up!
 Ashtyn Shine
Get your mama's house shot up!
Bodies all chopped up.
When them bodies come around,
I ain't gettin locked down.
So tell me what's up?

~*~

DON'T
Beth Ann Smith
Don't look at me that way.
It only makes me want you more.

Don't touch me like that.
It only leaves me lingering.

Don't say those words.
It only causes more confusion.

Don't, oh please don't lead me on.
It only causes more pain

~*~

I sit and ponder
All the questions that pass the people by
I think life
I think death
I cherish my thoughts
Trust only your imagination
For it is the only thing that is trustworthy
I am secretive
I will paint my thoughts
With my anxious eyes all over
The harsh floor beneath you
Why can't we fly
With no ground to depend on?
Now listen to me
As a tell you a tale
Of life

 ~ Aimee ~
~*~

EMPTY
Jade Seitz

Sitting here in a silent room
Numb to the rest of of the world
I feel nothing
Hate is not felt
There is no love
My thoughts are empty
I have searched my soul
Thinking there was something to find
But there was nothing
I remember I wanted to be loved
Or maybe just feel loved
But now I know the truth
There is nothing in me to be loved
I am empty
I block every thing out
It no longer matters
I am in my own silent world
Immune to everything

~*~

MY SECRET FRIEND
LusciousLJ
It is the secret I keep
When I fall asleep, its you I see
The world turns, people go on as before
It took me until now to find you there
The one I can never have
Its the secret driving me
Feeling it way down in the darkness
Lying alone in this big bed
I close my eyes, I see you
Your voice making me laugh in the dark
Wanting your hands on me, feeling me all over
The loneliness a pain I take with the pleasure of knowing you
My secret friend

~*~

My Darkest Friend
Meg Walker

As Sadness shadowed over me
Just as the waves of a great sea
A feeling not so unlike glee
Stirred deep within my soul.

It's been so long, my darkest friend.
The parties you did not attend.
Now happiness will finally end
Since you are back again.

I missed you as one misses pain,
But now you're here, my joy is slain,
And I can feel human again
For Sadness walks with me.

~*~

Rain
jolene prince

Grey clouds blend the sky
big wet rain drops fall
on my head
leaving me drenched with my
sorrow for you are gone
and won't be coming back
Reaching up i see a tree
for one that lighting struck
falling for me
and as i see i do
not move
i just reach up toward the sky
with open arms as if welcoming
them in to me
then as if a sign a branch 
falls next to me
the sky clears up and
i see that maybe there's hope

~*~

LEND A HELPING HAND
RENEE HOWBURG

BOUQUETS OF FAME SPREAD ALONG ASPHALT PATHS
TOUCH NOT THE BURNING COALS - THEY SCAR DEEPLY
OPEN YOUR HEARTS TO THE TIRED ONES
THEY KNOW NOT WHERE THEY GO
NOTICE SUNKEN EYES OF A WEARY LOT
COMFORT HAS ELUDED THEM
SENTIMENT IS NEW - TEACH THEM THE WAY
CRADLE THEIR FEARS

~*~

OUR PAIN
TIMOTHY LEE DEMARCO
EVER HAVE JUST ONE OF THOSE DAYS,
THINGS PROPOSED,
JUST SEEM INSANE?
EVER WANT TO SEVER THE MAIN VEINS OF SOMEBODY YOU HATE?
THEN THE ONLY REASON THAT STOPS YOU,
THAT SEEMS EVEN SANE,
IS YOU THINK, "THIS AIN'T THE RIGHT PLACE."
DO YOU EVER WONDER WHY IT ALWAYS POURS WHEN IT RAINS?
IT'S ENOUGH TO STRANGLE YOUR BRAIN,
THE THINGS WE LIVE THROUGH TODAY.
LIKE BEIN' HIT WITH A TRAIN,
ONLY LEAST TWO TIMES A DAY.
WONDERING WITH EACH WEEKS CHECK,
"WHAT BILLS CAN WE PAY?
WILL THIS KIND OF THING,
ALWAYS BE THE SAME?
IS THIS THE WAY I'LL ALWAYS BE PAID?".
WILL I ALWAYS WAKE UP IN PAIN FROM MIGRAINES?
THERE ARE TOO MANY THINGS, CAN YOU SEE WHAT I'M SAYING?
WE ALL ASK FOR PEACE,
BUT WE ALL WANT IT OUR WAY.
I'VE BEEN HERE TWENTY TWO YEARS,
FOR THE REST OF THEM I'LL PRAY.
~*~

Once in a Millennium
 Rio Bauce
once in a millennium flowers sing, birds vibrate, and it’s a new world. 
people are cheering and having fun. computers eat food and are talking. caterpillars are soaring high, high up in the sky. the mice are sensing trouble. the books are kissing wildly at each other.
cd’s are photographing each other. chairs are acting like they want
to play ping-pong. cups are cheering on printers to fight. cats sense
they should fly dogs to space. dictionaries are thinking about 
metaphors. buttons on peoples shirts eat people. clocks are laughing at computers cause they’re kissing keyboards wildly.
hands on animals are playing “steal the bacon”. backpacks are
playing with a jack-in-the-box. cars are setting their alarms off.
bracelets are fighting necklaces on a piece of broccoli. radios
are hooting like owls with laughter and are cheering on the wizards
to win against the witches. stairs are cheering for equality. but i 
wouldn’t want a frying pan hitting a can. so don’t let a light bulb hit
a soccer ball. let numbers live in castles and gardens. along with
zombies living in mansions. priests killing people. that’s how crazy
people are once in a millennium.

~*~

One Touched Soul
Touching one person
Only with words
Leaving the skin untouched
Receiving the heart
The heart of that person
To caress and to hold
Trusting one another
That each will do right
Feeding the heart
With the food of your love
The sunlight of your touch
And the home of your body
Interchanging like vulture
To form one 
One touched person
Out of two lost souls
Sammy Saleh 

~*~

The waters flowing
constantly, gently, swiftly
bringing sustenance
my thoughts hopes, dreams of you
provide ripples in your heart?
David Beard.

~*~

Evil Stalks, the human prey
Nightly crawls, upright days
Outside appearance, blending in
Look to the eyes, evil dim

Sticking the heart, not satisfied
A gapping hole left inside
Sucking blood, off the remains
Naked emotions, screams of pain

Never knowing whence the beast
Shall plunder down, upon his feast
Worst than vultures, they hide behind
Ordinary faces, of all mankind
Corinne S Cook

~*~

Lots of food are good.
To me, pizza is the best,
Pepperoni and hamburger.

All kinds of toppings,
It will make your mouth water,
Just the thought of it!
Ashlyn Shine

~*~

WALK AWAY...
jake Flood 
I can not forget you,
you almost kissed me, I almost cried
I wanted to die there and then.
You almost touched me but you walked away,
you made me feel alive.
I can not stop thinking about you,
I want to kill someone,
want to kill all the time,
contain my rage.
I would kill for you,
take a life and destroy it for you,
I love you

~*~

PATTERNS
Thalamus' Ink.

What ding or dent
did represent
the first hint
that this was meant
perhaps to signal
to all the blind
that scars 
and detours
are divine
and not
an omen in decline
but Jesus' life to define
the road to calvary

~*~

I'll Be Your Sunshine
Sarah Falls 

Play by the sun,
And cry a sweet summer’s rain,
There is no need to hide,
Behind these clouds of pain.

Let the light stick to your skin,
And lick your tears dry,
Allow the sun to clear,
Your dark and isolated sky.

I know there is so much,
That you wish you could do,
But it is your pain and suffering,
That keeps you subdued.

Dodging hard raindrops
Is easier to abide,
Then leaving your problems,
Off to the side.

So I just want to let you know,
And help you to see,
That matter no what happens,
You can count on me.

Let me be your sun,
To make your skies blue,
Let me be the one,
To always be there for you.
~*~

A BLESSING IN DISGUISE
T eresa Douglas 

SHE DIED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT,
WHAT OF I DO NOT KNOW
BUT I BELIEVE IN MY HEART
IT WAS A BLESSING IN DISGUISE.

NOT THAT SHE IS GONE,
BUT THAT HER PAINS NO MORE.
SO WHILE WE ARE CRYING WE SHOULD BE REMEMBERING THE GOOD TIME.
THAT'S REALLY WHAT WE SHOULD THINK
NOT HOW COULD GOD DO THIS.

NOT AS A PUNISHMENT BUT A BLESSING IN DISGUISE.
THAT DAY THE 19 OF APRIL IN THE YEAR 1997
WE GOT A BLESSING IN DISGUISE.
YES HER PAIN WAS GONE,
THOUGH IT LEFT US WITH A HOLE IN OUR HEARTS.
THOUGH IT WILL SOON HEAL,
BUT NOT COMPLETELY GO AWAY.
IT WILL LEAVE A SCAR TO REMIND US,
OF A BLESSING IN DISGUISE

~*~

Sometimes my whole world just comes crashing down and I lay beneath the rubble. I know if I put in some effort I can lift this stone off my heart but on a bad day when you wish you could sit down and cry. You would rather stop fighting. Yet this is where we must believe in hope the most . You know if you give up you will die but if you try you might survive I get so frustrated with people I never belong anywhere. I feel as if I'm not real sometimes and I just hurry through life trying to find that place where I'm free to love our earth that we were put upon and celebrate life just because we live in it 
Have you ever felt like you knew a stranger that you have been friends before somehow I see that in faces that look at me and open their mouths to speak to me I see so much deeper than what they say I can see their weakness and strengths I know they do not see me as they look at me with judgmental eyes I feel alone in a world of a billion souls wondering if the American dream is how I choose to live. I once played follow the leader as a child and I hated it
Where am I going from here nothing remains the same as the seasons change so do life I try to squeeze some kind of meaning out of this saga around us all and I only see self destruction .we have forgotten how weak we are. take away the guns and the weapons take away the money and hell even take all the clothes ,the houses, the cars, and picture for me what the world would look like and that is how equal we really are 
Kim Wall
~*~

He passes by, cuter then can be.
Hitting my shoulder or smiling with a gentle wave.
I follow him to his locker 
hoping to get a kiss, a hug or a peaceful hello.
We may not show our feelings 
but we both know we feel the same.
 Heidi Stull

~*~

AS...
Michelle...

As hours move on, in confusion I lie,
will you ever give us a try,

As days pass on, my curiosity seems to grow,
where are the feelings that you never let show,

As months go by, the closer you and I should be,
why do you keep your distance from me,

As time moves ahead, the more you'll push me away,
when I finally go, will you ask me to stay,

As seasons begin to change, maybe I'll finally see,
why your heart had chosen to never include me....

~*~

-Light-
 Nathan Barrett
My angel of light glided into my life.
and chased all the shadows into the night.
New hope arose in my soul.
She kissed me and my dreams came true.
Her beauty is more blinding than the midday sun.
The sound of her heart is like a thousand harps.
She has given me a reason to wake up each day.
Neither mountain nor sea could keep me from her.
Each passing hour with her is a beautiful eternity.
Our precious children dance in her eyes.
We will have dances in the rain,
and passion under the stars.
My heart yearns to hold her tightly.
By her side I will reside for an eternity.
Hand in hand we will face life,
all the beauty and the darkness.
Draped with her love
I can do anything, be anyone.
I am her true love.
She is mine.
Without her by my side, 
I am incomplete.
I hurt when she is apart from me.
My angel of light glided into my life,
and gave me new life, and hope.

~*~

Untitled
 Beth Sorcha

Your Tears
Floating on the breeze
Streaming like an ocean
Vibrant as the orange-red sari of a Hindu woman
And they fall
But not for me my friend
My melancholy friend
My could-be-lover
My would-be-saint
Maybe they fall for that girl you met down by the ocean that runs across our lawn
Or maybe for that girl you once knew in school
The one who left you yearning for more than just a glimpse of her vivacious spirit
But they fall
And they float
And they glide
Into my open hands

Your tears
Floating on the breeze
Streaming like an ocean
Vibrant as the orange-red sari of a Hindu woman
And they fall
But not for me my friend
How conceited to think they ever would
Oh how long I shall wait
So for now I take these
As they fall
And they float
As they glide
Into my open hands

~*~

INSIDE OF ME
~Sharla
I run at such a speed, without knowing what i want or need.
the stress, the fears, the endless tears, 
they silently bloody me within.
Will I ever have peace again?.
My mind twirls and spins without release, 
like that of a whirl wind that has captured a leaf .
Thoughts and emotions all out of place 
without understanding without an escape.
My gut churns and grinds in pace with my mind,
how can i find serenity in this life of mine?.
God!,I want to scream. No one will hear.
so I retreat again with silent tears.
.I want to sleep ,I want relief. 
I long for a moment of peace.
I close my eyes to escape all the commotion, 
praying to be free of all emotions.
I see darkness and solitude within my slumber.
I start to feel like I am just a number.
.It all seems to fade as i drift away.
praying there will never come another day.
magically contained in the soul of sleep. 
finally I find peace, escape, relief.
I never want to wake to the toucher of my life. 
Just let me sleep until the end of time.
~*~

'Summer's complaint'
by Patrick Seguin

Summer came by, and I 
scared up noises in her 
box, caught fresh tunes
off the coast of her hips, her
teeth humming; Summer:
blues, reds, yellows, scenes
from a nighttime lifetime, 'Sure
gets better than this,'
said Summer with a slow drawl, and
it made my head ache
to see her sitting
too pretty to whine, like her
LA Daddy and her
NYC Mum, it happens
every New Year's, each
holiday a bit bluer
than the last; come down
to see her see me
groping into the volume
of Summer's complaint.

~*~

Lost
Heather Morris

A boiling cauldron of madness 
I sit here in limbo 
Awaiting the arrival of my lost dreams 
The forgotten babies of a once well mind 
Arms spread wide to welcome them 
Wishing to smite them with wounded hands 
Brought to pain by false perceptions 
Placed upon a weary soul of innocence bound 
And inside, weeping and wailing uncontrollably 
Spinning as a lost child in a whirlpool of misery 
On the surface, a stone face, a backbone of steel 
On the inside, dying of an alien disease 
That at a longer gaze seems all too familiar 
To this suicidal dreamer

~*~

here we go round,
the old climbing tree,
here we go round,
until someone saves us, from our false sense of security;
toys will be toys,
and days will be days,
the clock will turn,
and minds will change;
here we have found,
the place where we once played,
here we have found,
shelter from a mind numbing raid;
toys will be toys,
and days will be days,
the clock will turn,
and shatter glass parades;
here we go down,
to play in the rain,
to save ourselves,
from the death of our brain;
L.A. Price

~*~

thought
vanessa
sometimes i wonder why i'm here
sometimes i wish i could close my eyes disappear
sometimes i think about it 
believe me i do
sometimes i think about it 
how i wish it were true
die out 
vanish
fall into the darkness forever
~*~

A TITANIC LOVE STORY
Thelma Barkman
Forever to behold, upon the ship of dreams,
A love story from the legend Titanic told;
As lovely as her portrait he a talented young painter,
It was by chance of fate, two brave hearts youth intertwining,
For different worlds were they, moments together stolen,
Not to be seen, were only their sound of laughter,
More than the Crown Diamond, The Heart of the Ocean, they say,
Their love was to be a greater treasure,
Her own kind she forsaking,
Since it then came the Titanic disaster;
Alas she lost her true love, swept out into the sea,
So she could live instead of he:
To her it were as though ,the ship's splashing waves below,
They were the years passing by,
Blue pendant, now bluer than her faded eyes,
Swirling, sparkling, she thrust upon black waters,
Near her portrait with pendant heart upon her breast,
She laid down to her final rest,
Forever to behold her true love,
Beneath the ocean on The Ship Of Dreams.
~*~

the reflections of life of the passing pool seem to describe what we really see.
not a reality but an easy misery we pretend to play.
Reality is the warmth that we felt once when we were loved,
when we recognized beauty as it was and still,
everything that is pure.
Reality is as we make it.
misery is not reality but is the opposite its what we make up in our own minds.
D.F. 

~*~

THE BIG ONE
 abba onyeani

--IF it had its choices 
you would have seem to have
been run by strings.

--are YOU THE MARIONETTE
OR ITS MAKER?
For THE LIMITATIONS HAVE OUTER
LIMITS, READY FOR A FLAG.

--ONCE PLANTED, SURVEY THE LAND
TILL THE SOIL, THERE will be
weeds.

--is the fertile land ready
or have you let it go?
whichever it may be
its your land.

~*~

Almost Lost
Teirney Humberson

The whispering wind calls to
me; through the open meadows 
I run free.

Grass up to my knee's, wishing
and saying," Don't let me fall,
please."

Memories are all that are 
on my mind, so I escape.
Here there is no place and time.

A figure appears across the way;
the one I was hoping would show
up today.

He runs in my path, leaping beyond
my stride, him I cannot defy.

A kiss so soft, and to think
this love was almost lost

~*~

I HATE IT!
-Crystal Hutchings

I hate it when you look at me,
With confusion in your eyes.
I hate it how the clouds go dark,
When you fill my head with lies.
I hate the way you treat me,
and make my soul begin to die.
But most of all I hate it when,
I have to say goodbye.

~*~

I sit here barely breathing 
While you continue to live just fine
Everyday I just keep wishing 
That tomorrow will be my time
To meet my eternal resting place
So I can face
Death
When I'm completely out of breath
Bryan Turner

~*~

ALONE IN THE CITY
Kristy Holtz 
I will be staying in the city this summer;
Jeremy's going away.
The time, it's passing us by so quickly,
And you know I count every day.
He's leaving me here all alone in this city,
With the dark and cold cement floors.
He's ridding himself of the memories, the pain,
And the rusty, squeaky old doors.
I guess all the hopes and tears can't hold us together,
And even love is not quite enough.
It's fate itself that sometimes keeps us apart,
And that's when we finally give up.
Everything's just fallen apart so quickly,
And it's beginning to live up to my fears.
For I have nothing left to hold onto.
He was my only ray of sunshine here.
I will be staying in the city this summer.
Jeremy's going away.
He looks me in the eyes every night and says,
"You know it's better this way."
~*~

Sharing
Dennis L. Pickering Copyright 2000 

Marriage is a precious, crowning gift
Upon which hopes are placed.
Just remember to GET, GET, GET,
One has to GIVE, GIVE, GIVE.
~*~

For Jay:
Ami Fryman-Miller

I've been burning down bridges since you ran off with my wings
Leaving me to fly on my face.
You see, in reality you've done to me everything you'd never do
And I've gone off to blame someone else.
You're perfect in your little world
And when your head gets too big they wont say.
I hate being friends but you know everything
Kick in the dirt, my face is red
But everything hurts too much to show.
I stand where the people often to 
When they've been pushed apart from the rest.
I want to believe for myself now
I'll never make that mistake again.
Don't talk to me about anything
I wont let myself tell you.
About living out disappointments
And you being first.

~*~

Gentle Embrace
 Kenneth Brown
The silent air of this moonlit night
Reminds me of your love which feels so right
Each time we meet and gently embrace
As your lips press firmly upon my face

The warmth of your touch is so amazing
As I look within you eyes which are a-blazing
With the burning desire to satisfy my mind
Searching for true love as we're sure to find

The radiation of your breath upon my skin
Is so refreshing as it has ever been
Feeling your heart as you softly touch my hand
Happening so freely, as if it had been planned

To leave you now, I can only wish
That you'll turn and wink while blowing a kiss
To the man who loves you with so much grace
As I long for that next loving gentle embrace
~*~

Overnight
Nasheikah Bennett-Aquart
Mommy was in the salon 
when the call came in .
She said she'd be right there ,
to your rescue.
Isn't it funny , 
we claim we are grown up ,
but as soon as trouble lands on your head ,
we run for our mommy.
And what happened this time ?
You hit your girlfriend .
again and again 
until that lil' voice within, 
told her to call policemen! 
Now you sit your ass in jail over night ,
mommy said you need time to think.
Said she be up all night, her baby in jail and all.
Said it was harder than watching her teenage daughter split open by a baby.
Leaving her son in jail over night would drive him crazy with hate for her .

~*~

My Reasons
 Marie Jackson 

The feeling of your heart beat
next to mine
The touch of your hands
upon mine
The love flowing as I look in your eyes
These are my reasons
Oh so many reasons
The way you sacrifice all the dreams
you have, the way your life has now 
become mine
With all your heart
all your soul, as we become one 
With my reasons
OHH so many reasons
I see a gleam as I look at your silent
shadow walk towards mine
Bound by fate our love wouldn’t wait
my chapter ends, 
Then a new one begins, as I look in to your eyes
The feelings the endless love the passion flows
I found my life and it begins in your eyes
Oh the many reasons
They’re are so many reasons 
My reasons that I LOVE YOU
~*~

Reality 
Simone
Loneliness, disappointment, and heartache
This is my reality
One who may seem drama free to others
Is filled with my reality
People think they understand
But they'll never know my reality
One incident, problem, or one technicality
Will never help you understand my reality

Now you may go through life never knowing my reality
And for those few who are lucky, I wish you well
Cause what will happen to you next
Only time can tell

Now you may think, "This will never be me"
And for all those people in denial
Just sit back, relax, and see
Cause you thought you was strong, maybe invincible
Handling anything that comes your way
But it's just the simple principle
It's not only my reality 
It will soon become yours too

~*~

My Reality
Christopher M. Smith

Rays of darkness pierce the light,
deep inside the sullen void 
of my weary soul.

I am life and death
I am obscure, 
and yet,
I am resilient
I know immortality
I am a ferocious predator
waiting for the kill.

I am not of this world,
and I feed on fear
I know fear
I am fear.

I am impulsive
I am apprehension and dismay
I am spirit.

The moon shows my face
The earth shows my pain
I am one
I am many
I am comfort
I am pain.

My life is a river of sorrow,
and at the end,
there lies endless happiness 
and contentment.
~*~

We Could...
Amanda Allen .

We could fall in love
but there's doubt in your eyes.

We could share our secrets for our lifetimes 
but you can't trust

We could be perfect in harmony for the rest of our lives
but you can only see the imperfections.

We could fly the wings of love, and climb the mountains of ecstasy.

We could forever be one in love
but you just don't believe.

~*~

In Just Two Days
Lynn Catherine Ferrey

In just two days
She will be gone
Our friendship a forgotten song
A new life awaits
Lying on the stars of fate
I open my eyes
In hope it will erase my lack of good-byes
Holding tight
With all of my might
Onto you
In just two days
~*~

THE KNAVE OF HEARTS
John Millus

Don't shudder, my friend, don't shiver,
For Summer will bring the sun;
The Jack will go back in the Deck of Life,
And the world will be as one.

The time of trial is over,
And day will dawn as clear 
As ever a May in Dover
Above the white cliffs sheer.

We'll stroll on the beach at Brighton
And dine with the Bishop's wife,
And get on with the art of living;
And get on, and get on with life.

Don't shudder, my friend, don't shiver,
For Summer will bring the sun;
The Jack will go back in the Deck of Life,
And the world will be as one.

~*~

CONVERSATIONS IN MY HEAD
Beggar from Slovenia
I opened my B-day bottle of champagne myself, did I tell you?
I consume 3 coffies, aspirin and bars of chocolate daily, did I tell you?
I might go to Australia and Hong Kong this summer, did I tell you?
I cut my skin, did I tell you?
When people yell I go and sit under the washbowl in the bathroom, faced to the wall, did I tell you?
I performed CPR and saved a boy's life, did I tell you?
I haven't gone anywhere near the college for 5 months and I lie about it at home, did I tell you?
Dad roared at mom he'd break her jaw, did I tell you?
A woman in our street left her two year-old son home alone and he died in a fire her cigarette lit, did I tell you?
Peter got a job,did I tell you?
I spend hours sitting at my grandma's grave,did I tell you?
Mom's spine hurts like a bitch and I take care of her, did I tell you?
I watched pics of elementary school the other day and I cried. I was so happy back then,did I tell you?
I wanted Mike to give me Korn's Issues for my B-day but he gave me a fuckin candy box. I'm gonna miss him; he's gonna serve the army any time now,did I tell you?
I'm scared, did I tell you?
I went to Bloodhound Gang concert and it was great except everybody kept asking me about my swollen eye; even Jared, the bass player, did I tell you?
I can't breathe normally when people yell, did I tell you?
Sometimes I imagine I go with Munky on a cup of tea and that we stay in the bar the whole day talking, did I tell you?
I miss you, did I tell you?
~*~

Senior Prom...
AllY B.

I really don't want to go
To the stinkin' prom
It's going to really blow
But it will please my mom.

Drew is quite a strange little guy.
Wears his tennishoes with his tux
I think I might just cry
This prom thing really sucks.
~*~

The Broken Heart
By Wendy R.

My heart was once broken,
because my feelings were unspoken.
I loved him more than anything,
even though he knew it not.
Regretting the day our unconditional love would end,
I spent more time with him till the end.
Although I loved him with all my heart,
He finally had to break my heart in to tiny pieces.
And so I ask him why her over me,
he replied because you knew not how to show your love for me,
but she can expresses her love and feelings for me,
So goodbye I say to thee.

~*~

Finding 
 Stephanie Polson
Anger boils, hot and steaming,
Passion, wanting to expose itself,
Explodes in a rampid furry.
Love that wants to become known,
Knocks on the outer wall of my secluded heart.
While hatred barricades loves way,
All to jealous of its impact.
Just when I thought it was all too much,
Everything seemed to subside.
I have discovered life again.
Found the answers to all of my agonizing questions.
My feelings have been held discrete until this very breathing moment.
By knowing all of the emotions that have been experienced up until now,
Have not been senseless.
I have a new understanding,
purpose,
and reason to be true and whole again.
I have found you.

~*~

Do you have what it takes, CAN YOU?
Can you promise to be there,
When I'm crying and alone, Can you help me with my problems
And need someone to care? As life hands them out? 
Will you wipe the tears from my face, Can you be the one to help me, 
When i have a bad dream? Push away my doubts?
Will you hold me in your arms , Can you be strong for me 
So well be an unbeatable team? When i am to week? 
Will you brush away my hair, Can you help me find my voice, 
When i'm sick and on the floor, When i feel i cannot speak?
and i feel like there's no one, When i finally find the courage
To love me anymore? To say i love you,
Will you walk me threw my life, Can you promise me,
And hold my hand? That you'll say it too? 
Will you talk me to places,
Nobody else can?
Can you show me your dreams,
As i show you mine?
Can we reach them together 
Before we run out of time?
If someone hurts me and breaks my heart, ~Judy~
Can you be the one to pick up the parts?
Judy Davis 

~*~

"LOW DOWN"
MILENA ASSENOVA

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME
BUT ALL I FEEL IS BETRAYAL AND LOW
I STAY AWAKE AT NIGHT, THINKING ABOUT YOU
BUT YOU DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT
I CAN'T HELP OR FORGET MY FEELINGS FOR YOU
FEEL LIKE THERE'S A CHEMISTRY
SAD THAT YOU DON'T FEEL THE SAME WAY

YOU KNOW THERE'S ONE THING I DON'T GET
WHY DO I ALWAYS FEEL THIS WAY
I AM FOREVER ENDING UP LOVING SOMEONE ELSE
I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE THAT ANYONE FEELS THIS ABOUT ME
I DON'T REALLY KNOW, BUT I'M TAKING
FOR EVER AND EVER TO KNOW
WANT TO BE YOUR SWEETHEART, BUT
WHAT WILL YOU TELL YOUR HEART
HOW CAN YOU, WHEN YOU DON'T FEEL THIS 

HOWEVER I'M A GET OVER THIS AND 
MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE,
COULDN'T CARRY IT ON NO MORE
~*~

THE MISTAKE WAS MINE
Copyright ©2000 Susan Nott 

How cold run the rivers of my blood
Listen to my heart, with a thud, thud

This is the sound of continuous pain
A hurt running so deep, nothing left to gain

Once there was just bitterness and sorrow
Now I find myself yearning for a new tomorrow

I thought I'd found a love so pure and right
So why, oh why did I give up the fight?

Was it because, this love was never meant to be
My heart cries stay, but the body does flee

What's left for me now, so unsure?
Not more pain, how much must I endure

The mistake was mine, for bearing my soul
The wanting and yearning has taken its toll

Once I was grateful for what life gave
I now find myself wishing for a grave
~*~

Today I saw you with another:
straining to see your silhouette
shaking with laughter.
your face almost cracking
with a never-ending, 
room-brightening smile.
Could those sparkling blue eyes be mine?
shining in the dark 
like newly cut amethyst
too quickly bought.
too tempting (not to buy)
from its glass case,
recently polished, 
sitting on the jewelry store counter.
I wonder...
What would it be like
to possess those eyes?
Smooth as glass 
in warm caressing hands.
Only dusky dreams 
will allow such radiance.
But when sunrise appears
I just
Anticipate tomorrow.
 Heather Joy

~*~

I Remember You 
By Claudia Amaya

I remember you were that guy I saw at the beach.
You were that guy with the green eyes like grass.
You were that guy who said he was single.
You were that guy always dressed in black like if you were going to a funeral.
You were that guy that I believed in.
You were that guy that I saw kissing a girl tenderly.
You were that guy that broke my heart into crumbs.
I remember you very well, even if you forgot me.
~*~

"I, Suppose"

should I become a writer
if all else fails
if I want to be
I, Suppose.
should I be what I want
to be 
you see
I cannot write I have no hands
but I am
I, Suppose
and with Clothes
I make a man
I, Suppose
but he will not grow
no matter how good is
Seed feed
Clothes said
the soul and all in all
whole is whole, Suppose
so take Clothes
and be what you be
said Seed read
and educate Whole
who will in turn
grow 
Hands
will come with Time
who will share a rhyme
i can not make you a man
said Clothes
but a man will make me 
a writer
I, Suppose.
JMcCleary

~*~

LIFE, THE GATEWAY DREAM
Carla D Blythe 

Christmas is almost here now,and in Heaven it must be grand;for we know you are safe in the palm of an angel's hand.Memories are very precious this I've come to know;for memories are ever-lasting;you never let them go.Special things go to Heaven,for that's the way it's meant;you were chosen for Heaven picked from the very best.

~*~

Christmas 
hICJENN

CHRISTMAS IS A TIME TO BE THINKING OF OTHERS 
MOTHERS FATHERS SISTERS BROTHERS
CHRISTMAS IS A TIME TO BE CARING AND LOVING 
IT'S NOT A TIME TO BE FIGHTING AND SHOVING
MERRY CHRISTMAS BIG AND SMALL 
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO US ALL.
~*~

Poems Copyright © Designated Authors 2000.
Page Copyright © AHApoetry.com 2000.

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